To try

In less than a week, the fall semester will be over. I am excited to take a hiatus from academic life. One month free from papers, textbooks, and Chaucer!

I am hoping that this free time will allow me to make considerable strides towards independence.

After a few more lessons, I plan on taking my road test to get my license. I almost expect to fail the first time, out of nerves. Second time's the charm? I know I'll get there and reach that goal. I've had to be very patient because often the timeline in reality is very different than the timeline I have set for myself in my head.

I also plan on making a dent in my service dog applications. My major hurdle is the essays in which I explain why I need the service dog, my lifestyle, and ultimately this is where I ask for help. Therein lies the difficulty; asking for help. For me, asking for help like this emphasizes the fact that I have cerebral palsy. Something which I do not always wish to acknowledge, especially when having a disability makes me appear weak or needy in some way.

I hate that!

But I will suck it up and write the essays required for the applications. I must remind myself that these essays do not need to be of Pulitzer prize-winning quality. Most of all, I just need to write them and do so from the heart, without prejudging and over analyzing every word I put on the page.

I suppose it is most fitting that the word essay means to try. So, over this break, I will try. Sometimes that's all one can do is try. But with any hope, I will also succeed!